The world has always had its fair share of raving lunatics that society doesn't quite know what to do with. I'm not talking about clinically loco, Hannibal Lechter types...I'm talking about people who relentlessly throw their pancreas in harm's way, in order to get their thrills. People who trick death--just to prove that they're alive, and who can't wait to get their fix from what will surely be their next skin popping, sphincter puckering adrenaline rush.

  Well...not so long ago, these people were given frontal lobotomies--clinical procedures in which people's skulls were split open so that the frontal lobes of their hyperactive little brains could be loped off with a pair of fancy wire cutters. The frontal lobe, mind you, is the part that's supposed to tell your brain to give a crap about stuff (anything, really).
  So people with frontal lobotomies walked around unable to be passionate about anything. I'm not sure why they stopped doing the procedures. I'd like to think it's because they were the most horrifying mutilation procedures in the history of invasive medicine...but in reality, it's probably because they cost so much. What with managed health care and all, they must have figured it'd be cheaper to label these people as "extreme" and give them an excuse to hang out together--and out of mainstream society's way.
  And thus were born Extreme Sports, The X Games, Boardercross, etc. That was also the birth of Frontal Lobotomy--"Thrashin' Thredz for Brainless Hedz!" Now you've got clothing that's shreddin', high flyin', hard grindin', ten hanging groin bustin' and packed with an attitude--just like you! So...what are you waiting for?!
 
Get your FL gear and get out there and try to give your neighbor's rottweiler a coffee enema.